A Solemn Watcher

Well, I’m pleased you’re enjoying it!

I haven;t abandoned this, I have just been:

a) busy with other projects

b) busy with life stuff

c) having SUPER writer’s block on the next track

but I will get there!

I don’t think I have a meaningful direct answer; it varies too much depending on the record, so reporting a mean would be misleading, and in any case I don’t know what it is (too much of my listening - Youtube, television -  is done in places where I have no computer programs tracking it for me).

Perhaps the best I can do is describe my “process” of listening, for these reviews:

Step 1: I listen casually to the track. This happens whenever I first happen across it, which is often not at the same time it first enters the chart - it might be through an internet link somewhere, or from early promotion on TV music video channels, so I may not realise I’m going to NEED to review it (although a lot of the time you can predict it’ll get into the top 40 somewhere at some point). In any case it’s rare that I get to a track in the charts without having casually happened upon it at least once up to that point, so I always come with some preconceived ideas.

Step 2:  Focused listen. If I am reviewing it, I try to at least once just listen to the track by itself, all the way through, with no distractions. This may be optionally accompanied by a focused watch of the video, if there is one. This is usually when things about the track grab me, and these grab points inform what I listen for most closely subsequently.

Step 3: Close listening, lyrics. Here I try and work out what the lyrics are if it wasn’t already obvious, helped out by Google searches for written transcriptions if necessary. I don’t feel comfortable expressing an opinion until I have a definite handle on what the lyrics are (although what they MEAN is quite another matter!). This may include looking up specific words as well if they employ slang, dialects, other languages or patois with which I am unfamiliar, or otherwise don’t denote anything for me.

Step 4: Close listening, music. I try to put the lyrics aside and work out what’s musically going on. I know less about instruments then I do about words, but I try my best to identify instruments, note samples and so on. Again, internet research helps.

Step 5: Form thoughts. This step often involves discussion (sometimes with you, or otherwise with my wonderful fiancee) about feelings about the records. I typically think of specific sentences or little thoughts that I want to say and write those down into a kind of skeleton post, sometimes beta-testing these thoughts on unsuspecting individuals like yourself first. This requires a lot of piecemeal listening, sometimes cutting back and forth to listen to a particular passage over and over.

Step 5b (optional): Listen to other tracks. Sometimes what will be notable from my analysis in step 5 is the resemblance or relationship to other pieces of music, so I’ll need to listen to those too, in an attempt to make sure I’m not just talking out of my arse about them.

Step 6: Write the damned article. I usually leave the track on in the background as I write, in case extra inspiration strikes as I go. (It often does!). I try and shape up my Step 5 skeleton into some kind of structure, vaguely attempting to make sure that I have discussed the music as well as the lyrics (and optionally the video if I felt the need). I then look at my pile of paragraphs, realise there is no particular structure nor anything my English teacher would endorse as a proper introduction or conclusion, try to hammer one paragraph or other into being a conclusion, fail, say “fuck it”, and publish the damn thing anyway. Often without a proper spelling, grammar or sanity check, which leads to a protracted stage 6b of stealth editing, during which I probably don’t listen to the song, or indeed any music, unless the error I’m correcting was about a quote from the lyric or something.

All this might involve one or more (or even zero) “listens” each step, so the total listens can vary widely. To take recent examples, I think I only listened to “Warzone” about five times fully ever. “Take Care” was closer to thirty, and then I had to listen to the tracks it sampled and that I referenced in the article as well, so that was much more.

Foods: 

I think I eat all of them for sentimental reasons? This is why I am clinically obese I guess :). I usually eat at least somewhat for pleasure, and happy memories and warm emotions are part of that. Sausages make me think of my dad and his enthusiasm for good sausage; mashed potato makes me think of my mum’s indulgent, naughty smile whenever she suggested it; roast dinner makes me think of the family around the table.

Math: 

we always say “maths” here in the UK! One of those things. But anyway yes I can do reasonable mental maths - I took maths all the way to A-Level and then did a degree in physics, and so mental math skills tends to come with that territory - it’s not necessary because calculators, but it does help speed you up. My main problem in mental math is that I’m not trusting enough of my instincts to blurt out an answer quickly - I check and recheck in my head and as such end up sometimes no quicker than a calculator would have been.

Often a big help, and a skill physics students are taught, is to find an approximate answer first and then refine it: rather than do 325 x 127, get 325 x 100 (32,500), get 325 x 30 (9,750), add together (42,250) then get 325 x 3 (975) and subtract from total (41,275), which is the answer. Depending on the purpose, sometimes 325 x 130 would be close enough, so you can cut the process short.

In actual fact physicists rarely deal directly with anything so prosaic as actual multiplications of large integers - the point is more to manipulate algebra into creating a formula which gives you a general conclusion expressing some physical fact about the universe, in to which one COULD plus actual numbers if you need to. Doing a few quick multiplications and divisions is sometimes part of this, especially if you want your formula to come out neatly, but it is really a secondary skill.

Colour:

I used to always say blue as a kid, I think because it seemed like red and blue were the only acceptable choices for a boy, and I found red too gauche or something.

As a theoretical adult I no longer see my favourite colour as an all important life defining choice as I once did, and so I am no longer so sure that I have one? I still like blue: I find it calming and serene. I typically dress in earth tones, greens and browns; nothing too rich or bold, but nothing too pastel and faint either. I no longer define myself in opposition to red, though, red is nice.

Sky: I get a rush of vertigo. I am like, wow, that’s high.

I think about the weather. Odds on, it’s the UK, so it is overcast. I adjudge the clouds for whether they threaten rain or not.

I think about why the sky is blue. I like to remind myself that I know the scientific reason (Rayleigh scattering), and marvel at how that elemental question asked by four-year-olds everywhere really does have an answer - but I also am humbled by how it isn’t REALLY an answer, that the very blueness of blue, and its not-redness and not green-ness and not-the-smell-of-fuitcake-ness remains, like all sensory qualia, thus far beyond analysis.

I think about outer space. This particularly if any astronomical bodies are visible, or if it is just a clear day. I think about the sheer, gibbering, mind-destroying scale of the universe, and our tiny place within it. I wonder about whether we have a future out there, as the human race. I wonder if we should. I wonder if whatever descendants of ourselves that do eventually head out into the vast nothingness will even be like ourselves enough to be called humans. I wonder why they’ll go, and what they’ll want to achieve. I think about galaxies like NGC 6744, theorised to be those that look much like our own, and wonder if just as we look out at their galaxy, some intelligence out there is looking back at us and seeing a similar picture, and wondering.

I think about heading inside. It’s probably cold out there, after all.